"Saddam Hussein" Addresses Iraqi People
Iraqi dictator "Saddam Hussein" took to the airwaves of Iraqi
state television to convince Iraqis that "victory over the foreign
aggressors is imminent."
Added Hussein, in his brief address: "I have temporarily forgotten
how to speak Arabic, but I can assure you, I really am Saddam Hussein."
Intelligence experts were unconvinced that it was actually Saddam who
was speaking, however, as his appearance seemed to be in contrast with
other recent pictures of him. In fact, many have pointed out that "Saddam"
resembled celebrated Las Vegas entertainer Wayne Newton more than he did
"I was kinda expecting "Saddam" to start doing some Vegas
showtunes," said a source from the Pentagon who repeatedly viewed
the tape for authenticity.
Reached by phone in California, Newton's agent seemed embarrassed with
the whole situation: "I knew that gig at the Baghdad Casino seemed