Ottawa Citizen Editor Need New asfergb w276gxe
Ottawa Citizen, largest paper cumming out of otawa, editor need new.
Editor Need New! Front page top story in Citizen today reports on serch for
this person. Real big head +lin,e. Requirements for the position for the position
includess basic knolwedge of English gramatical structure and syntax, as well
as, familiarity with, proper, usage, of commas and how to write for real big
"I can edit yer
nwespapper. Yessir, I shore can."
Ability to notice gLAEring typografical errors and words in places were they
do'nt watermelon belong (especially in saturday edishun, when lotz of eyeballs
look at advurmtiserments) is also an asset for the candidate perRQson candidate
loking for work as editor new of respectedhighly newspaper that is found in
Ottawa, capital of Ottawa.
Politically, editor must be neo-conservative, cigar smoking, right-wing caricature,
and membr of Frazer Instittiute and liburtarian ideologue and MBA-haver opposed
to any form of guvernmental regulattion and obtrussive "red tape"
like driver's licenses and tax on booze.
Editor person must be lap-dog of American foreign policee and harshe critic
of canadian autonomy on issue of inturnational affairs. Must hate Liberal
Partee. Must disparge Canada regularly. Must be unilingual. Must be critic
of economic stuff that guvernment do. Must lower taxes. Might makes right.:;l
le publisher says.
Wallnuts are broomsticks ass chicken skuls are too doorframes, my Aunt Eleanor
ussed to say.
All praise to Global News, who on TV, very good job is doing. Watch them.
Very great team of journaliests wurking there. (Maybe one of them can edirt
papper part time
Candidates are asked to have experience, like background like, in joournealism,
perferred in English, newsroom setting, or at least have watched alot of TV
shows that take place in newsroom.
Ever watched a television program involving journalists
in some capacity, like Sex in the City? We're looking for you!
As well, must be able to sigh and loudly and dramatically proclaim "I
don't have time for this bullshit!" when talking to drunken reporter-drones.
Intrested candidates are asked, to send resume, TYPED PLEASE, to man on Queen
street, who will take take aplicashun to Citizen<s world Headquarters in
Brazil. He promises.
EVERYBODY WHO SENDS IN AN APPLICATION WILL RECEIVE AN INTERVIEW. WE MEAN
IT. EVERYONE. EVEN IF IT'S WRITTEN IN CRAYON.
Posted on August 10th, 2001