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Pseudo-Intellectual Yoga, Golf and Spirituality Tips

by a Mysterious Man in line with you at the Bus Ticket Window

Pseudo-Intellectual Yoga, Golf and Spirituality Tips

Last week, we were in the midst of discussing the advanced stages of the suplination of the superannuated vortex to maximize centrifugal power. This week, we continue on this path to fulfilment and self discovery with an examination of the importance of the pranyama and ujjayi in furthering your golfing potential.

First, grab my back and feel the relaxation in the muscles. Grab it! I said grab it!!!! I know what your destination is! I know that's not your bus! You don't have any bus tickets!! That's why you're in line with me………Now be quiet and assist me in using prana to transmogrify the permeation of the life force that abounds in all of us!

There, that's better, isn't it? Don't you feel how supple my deltoids are? Just look at the shoulder turn that I can achieve! I've managed to achieve this top-notch state of physical condition and flexibility and lower my golf scores at the same time with the usage of Nadi Shodhana while loading my right side, contributing to the formation of my 'x' factor.

Stop looking away from me. You know that I'm right. I'm a professional golfer and a professional yoga instructor and a certified counsellor in life balance. I am a triple threat.

You still look a bit confused. It's really quite simple. All you have to do is open up your mind to the concepts that I'm introducing. I have a pamphlet that explains it all. Here, take one. Take it! Simply read up on this and we shall meet at the same spot next week at PRECISELY THE SAME TIME to discuss the effectiveness of Kundalini in controlling the trajectory of your short irons while working to maintain a complete sense of inner peace. Do not bring anyone else to this discussion, for these small minded individuals will simply try to refute all that we know. We shall also be discussing putting.

The path to enlightenment comes through devoted adherence to the pamphlet. All answers are in the pamphlet.

Posted on June 15th, 2001


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